التاريخ Wed, Oct 18, 2023

How does a mother control her anger with her children?

Do you sometimes find yourself feeling angry with your children, and trying to learn how to control this anger and express it properly? Controlling anger with children is very important. Just as excessive anger affects children, it also affects the mother and the relationship between them. Therefore, learning how to control anger with children is of great importance. In this article, we will discover effective strategies that mothers can use to control their anger properly while interacting with their children.

Anger and the causes of anger attacks

Are you a mother who has problems controlling your anger when dealing with your children?

Understanding what anger means and why tantrums occur may be the way to help you overcome these challenges and gain control over your children.

Anger is a natural emotional reaction that occurs as a result of internal feelings of resentment and anger. It occurs when we feel frustrated or dissatisfied with a certain situation or unacceptable behavior.

But not all tantrums are equal, as the causes may vary from one person to another. The causes of tantrums include:

  • Unrealistic expectations of children's behavior.
  • Inability to cope with daily stress or pressures.
  • Lack of communication and social skills.
  • Feeling some other repressed emotions such as sadness or fear.

Understanding the meaning of anger and knowing its causes can be the first step on your way to controlling your anger and improving your relationship with your children.

Types of tantrums

When a mother feels angry with her children, there are a few different forms that these outbursts can take:

  • One form of anger can be screaming and raising one's voice, where loudness and intensity become the main means of expressing anger.
  • Anger may also manifest itself in internal anger, where the mother holds her anger in but it builds up inside her, which may lead to a feeling of tension and psychological pressure.
  • Sometimes, anger can also manifest itself in hostility and neglect, as the mother avoids interacting with her children and shows a lack of concern for their feelings and needs.

Whatever forms of anger a mother manifests, it is important for her to learn how to control anger properly and effectively.

The importance of mothers controlling anger with children

Anger and loud voices scare children, although there are many actions that they do that lead the mother to this anger. It is important for the mother to try to control the children and her anger because of the importance of this:

  • Building healthy relationships: One of the most important aspects of controlling anger with children is that it helps the mother build a healthy and balanced relationship with her children, as she can interact with them in a calm and friendly manner.
  • Teaching peaceful interaction: When a mother controls her anger, she teaches her children how to deal with anger in a calm and controlled manner.
  • Fostering Mutual Respect: Anger management helps a mother build mutual respect with her children, as they learn how to interact in a respectful and friendly manner.

The negative impact of anger on mothers and children

When a mother feels angry with her children, it can have negative effects on both sides, as follows:

  • Dealing with daily difficulties and challenges can lead to increased levels of stress and pressure on the mother, which in turn can affect her overall health.
  • In addition, anger may lead to tension in the relationship between mother and children and negatively affect communication and mutual relationship.
  • Children may feel anxious and upset when they sense their mother's anger, and dealing with it contributes to the formation of negative behavior.

Fortunately, there are ways that a mother can follow to control her anger with her children, and this is what we will learn in the next paragraph, from the strategies for a mother to control anger.

Anger management strategies for children

Every mother has times when it is difficult to control her anger with her children.

But the mother has a great ability to influence her child and develop his personality, and one of the most important aspects of this is the skill of dealing with anger.

There are strategies that can help a mother control anger and deal with children and their behavior effectively and calmly, and realize the importance of controlling anger with children:

Act wisely and calmly:

  1. Above all, you must remain calm in difficult times.
  2. When you are calm, you give yourself the opportunity to think clearly and make logical decisions instead of acting out of revulsion.

Recognizing the stages of anger:

  1. Before you learn how to control your anger, understand your own stages of anger and their symptoms.
  2. By knowing them, you can better control your reactions.

Use positive methods of interaction:

  1. Instead of angry reactions, use praise and encouragement to reinforce your child's positive behavior.
  2. They may have unique qualities and talents that deserve recognition.
  3. Give praise and encouragement to children when they do good things.

Stop and think before you respond:

  1. It is important to review the situation and understand the possible reasons behind the child's behavior.
  2. There may be factors beyond the child's control that influence his behavior.
  3. Then, the mother should look for different ways to express her anger in positive and calm ways.

Regulate breathing and calm the nerves

  1. When you feel angry, take a deep breath and hold it for a few seconds and then release it slowly. This will help you calm your nerves and reduce the negative emotional feelings associated with anger.
  2. Take some time to get away from the noise and relax in a quiet place.
  3. Use meditation techniques such as focusing on your breathing to calm your anger, restore your inner calm, and realize the importance of controlling anger with children.

Setting boundaries and applying positive discipline:

  1. Establish appropriate rules and expectations for acceptable and unacceptable behavior.
  2. Talk to children clearly and firmly about these rules, and make sure they understand them well.
  3. Use positivity and encouraging comments to reinforce good behavior in children.
  4. Maintain your balance and encourage good will and discipline in their behavior.

Showing understanding as the mother tries to control her anger:

  1. Try to understand the feelings and emotions your child may be feeling.
  2. Be tolerant and willing to talk to him calmly and listen to his problems.

Adopting a healthy communication style: 

  1. Maintain positive, loving communication with your children.
  2. Try to be patient and understanding of their needs, and express your anger in calm and constructive ways.
  3. Take care of your psychological comfort and personal relaxation, as this will help you control your anger more effectively and provide a healthy environment for your children .

Justice and fairness in child control

  1. Injustice can cause increased anger and tension between you.
  2. Use purposeful punishment and positive reinforcement to encourage children to change their behavior.

Perception and learning from mistakes:

  1. Boost your child's confidence by teaching him that mistakes are an opportunity to learn and improve.

Additional resources

While mothers face significant challenges in dealing with their anger with their children, they can resort to additional resources to better control their anger, including:

  1. Educational books and articles for mothers

Educational books and articles for mothers are valuable tools to help them understand the nature of anger and how to deal with it.

Many specialized books can be found that offer practical advice and anger management strategies.

In addition, educational articles published online can be of benefit and provide advice and solutions for mothers in dealing with anger.

  1. Counseling and psychological support for dealing with anger

Seeking counseling and psychological support is an important step for mothers who want to control their anger with their children.

Mothers can look for local women's or mothers' support groups that offer motivational sessions and practical tips to promote mental health and well-being.

In addition, you can benefit from psychological counseling or consulting services to get individual support and guidance on how to control your anger and control children effectively.

Remember, as a mother, you play an important role in shaping your children’s actions and behavior. If you have difficulty controlling your anger, you can seek support from professionals specializing in social education or mental health, who are available at the Madrasa.com platform team of experienced psychological consultants who provide the best advice for a mother to control anger and deal with her child in the best way and without anger.

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